On Dinosaurs

Let’s cut to the chase. Dinosaurs rule.

You’re planning a birthday party for your two-year-old and want to have the best dinosaur-related music on hand. What to play? First off, how loud do you want to get? Real loud? Then let’s go deep into the Pleistocene. Let’s get your toddler’s blood a-pumping with percussive assault of Mastodon’s whip-snap thunderhoof drumming. Knock over some chairs. Hell, get wild and throw some Cheetos around the living room.

How about some sunbaked California rhymes that ride the oozing lava flows? Jurassic Five’s the ticket. Bob your head and look out your window to watch the megafauna to the beat of “Concrete Schoolyard.” What better way to teach your kid the lessons of life?

Is your toddler’s imaginary brontosaurus tastelessly urinating all over your Ikea furniture? Well then, it’s obviously time to walk the dinosaur. With the cheesiest moments of 1987’s “Walk the Dinosaur” by Was (Not Was), your baby brontosaurus’ bowels will surely be emptied out of doors in a jiffy. What’s that you say? “Brontosaurus” is an obsolete synonym for “apatosaurus”? Well, I’ll be. Who knew you were a paleontologist? It’s an imaginary dinosaur. My friend, your panties; please unbunch them.

Speaking of panties getting up in a bunch, T-Rex is sure to get your young niece’s panties tangled and twisted into the tightest of knots. Unless of course she’s not into the whole deep jam, glam-infused, blues rock of the late ’70s.

Get your kid a pair of sparkling skin-tight jeans and toss him a guitar. Have him play lead while you sing along to “Children of The Revolution.” Good times are sure to be had.

The cake, you ask? Well, that’s for you to figure out.

-Juan Fernandez


On Dead Rabbits and Designer Drugs

Pittsburgh is one weird city when it comes to live music. In early August, I went to Howlers in Bloomfield for a concert. There were two local openers, and the headliner that night was Dead Rabbits, a group from Georgia.

I was expecting nothing more than a regular bar gig. As per usual, I was blindsided. After getting on stage, the two-man Dead Rabbits ripped the carpet out from beneath us and started assaulting the blues mid-show. There was nothing more than a guitar, an amp, and a set of drums, and I’ll let you know that these whippersnappers’ performance would surely have the Black Keys thinking twice about playing the 12-bar blues again. The guitars, lush and with bass distortion, left no need for a bassist. Needless to say that this was a show that you walked out of buzzing with the high of testosterone and grinning like an over-sexed chimpanzee.

Well, what’s the point of my telling you about a show you missed, right? Check it.

Designer Drugs is coming to the Rex Theater this Thursday. You have no excuse not to be there: Tickets are only $10.50, and it’s a 17+ show, meaning even your kid sister can go.

Like with most DJs, with Designer Drugs it’s all about their live show. They’ve been through Pittsburgh two times in the past year and a half, so they must like something about the city, seeing as how most musicians find Pittsburgh to be one hell of a tough crowd. (More on that in a future Paperhouse.) The music, you ask? Electro. Hard electro.

Something that’s consistent throughout most Designer Drugs songs is a spooky “Dracula’s coming to town” synth such as the one found in “ZOMBIES!” Additionally, you can expect a show replete with fat synth bass blasts. Like most contemporary dance, the tempos are within the 128–132 bpm range, so it’s a blistering electro banger show.

-Juan Fernandez


On Nico Muhly

In the hype of new music, it is often too easy to forget the small players that make an album great. People do not stay abreast with the most popular producers or the most revolutionary sound engineers. I doubt anyone can name the new-faced composer who has taken over music in the last year. People should be more aware of the faces behind their favorite albums. People should know about Nico Muhly.

Muhly is a Western composer who has been responsible for some of the most interesting music this decade. The proof is in his album Mothertongue, with its highly experimental work on tracks like “Skip Town.”

Muhly has a wonderful style that cannot be replicated, much less described in words. He is one of this decade’s most important musicians, and unfortunately, no one knows about him.

Many people would point to Grizzly Bear’s Veckatimist as one of this year’s better albums, and looking forward, many people are also anticipating The National’s new album, High Violet, to be the rock album of the decade. Muhly has, predictably enough, a distinct presence on both of these albums.

It would be no small exaggeration to say that Muhly is responsible for the compositional brilliance of Veckatimist. In terms of The National, Muhly produced one of the most innovative arrangements ever heard with his work in the song “So Far Around the Bend” on The National’s Dark Was the Night. Looking at High Violet, we can expect much of the same magnificence with the track “Vanderlyle Crybaby Geeks,” thanks to Muhly’s distinct retooling.

People should be more aware of the faceless composers and musicians behind the greatest albums of the last decade. When thinking of The National and Grizzly Bear, people should think of Muhly. Most great bands I know have been helped along by a brilliant composer at some point or another; it’s time that we look at these composers in their own right.

-Stephen Epple


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